But other than that everything was fine. The appointment usually takes around 30 minutes. I was willing the results to be normal. And also what the prognosis would mean for our two year old: now a very happy child, he would have a completely different childhood with such an ill sibling. We also use cookies set by other sites to help us deliver content from their services. We bought a two tests that evening (quite lucky as I messed the first one up!). unfortunately the 20 week anomaly scan can pick up serious issues, hearing heart beats at midwife appointment doesn't let us know what's going on inside the body in detail. And with each one we had to have the same conversations. Our nightmare began when I went for my 20-week scan. The consultant showed us the letter with our result on and, yes, there were the words "Down's syndrome". factor is very strong. So we hid in our house. 26/09/2019 22:46. The baby kicked, blissfully unaware of what I had done. So choroid plexus cysts on their own, no problem, but if there's something else wrong, then that's a problem. It's quite common, perhaps 1 in 10 they find these, and within a few weeks they disappear. Can't seem to find info on the Internet. And I am slowly coming to terms with what has happened. I couldn't bring myself to push. My belly was growing and I was feeling great. We just couldn't use the words. The blood test confirmed it was twins. And I, and, I felt the weight of deciding what to do about it. And I, my husband and I both ran our own business at the time so we were desperate to get back and do some work, and things were going really well, so.. Again, we weren't understood. The people who did know what was going on seemed far too sure that we were doing the right thing, that there was really no choice to be made. I think at that time she had come to terms better with the fact that this baby was going to be terminated, and I don't think I was quite there. Still, the consultant thought things would be OK. In most cases the scan will show that your baby appears to be developing as expected but sometimes a condition is found or suspected. This was on the Friday. And this baby sort of floated, and occasionally there was a slight movement, but it was very you could almost see that he was really poorly just from looking at the screen. And I felt like a murderer. The same rush of excitement. So that was it. And I could see, before she even said anything I could see that there was something wrong with the heart. We couldn't say we'd lost the baby, because he was still kicking away, but we couldn't pretend everything was fine, either. So I was a bit ignorant of the kind of things, you know, what the scans were really doing - maybe it was, a bit na've I think. A black and white picture of your baby will then be seen on the ultrasound screen. He then told us what the prognosis would mean for the child. We went, I went in to the scanning room and they're quite bland facially anyway, whether everything's fine or not they just look at the screen to start off with and do measurements but I very quickly realised that the woman's demeanour wasn't, even for a bland face, was concerning. Being generous and kind generally happens only when you're happy. It wasn't measuring at all the right measurements for the age - there was a heart defect, the limbs were sort of distorted, the arms were, you know - you could see that the arms were very sort of contracted, the hands were contracted. I thought surely everything is ok, as they couldn't detect twins the week before. We were told to go to the hospital immediately. The rarest scenario is that the baby is severely ill and choices will need to be made. Forcing my hand to my mouth to take the tablet was probably the hardest thing I have ever done. Likely to have serious medical problems all his life. Tommys is a registered charity in England and Wales (1060508) and Scotland (SC039280). We had so much power, we could decide that this little thing should die. Sometimes specialist scans such as 3D scans, or MRI scans, are used to examine the baby in greater detail. I just want to be normal again. 13/12/2020 20:45. Any delay in receiving more information about the abnormality and its implications will be distressing for women and this should be acknowledged. The decision to terminate the pregnancy was my partner's and mine. We had the baby cremated. Could you tell? Sometimes doctors will wait to give the baby more time to develop and carry out repeat scans - this had confused several parents we talked to who had gone for repeat scans not knowing that the baby might have a problem. And everybody knows and everything is right. We had to discuss what we wanted to do with the little body after delivery. On the third day, we got a phone call. But you know I knew we had, we had to make a decision that was right for the baby as well. . Not marginalised into being a victim. Looked exactly like our two year old as a baby. It was real. So at least then we went to that next stage prepared for the worst really. So I lay on the bed and my partner sat next to me. It took 20 minutes to push him out. But they didn't. That he was small. The thing that I have a very strong memory of is this child's face in amazing detail. Picture every packed football staduim up and down the country - all healthy pregnancies and births. Sam squeezed my hand and told me it was ok. I don't know how we got through the next couple of days. After half an hour of lying on the bed, I was starting to get nervous, but was excited to find out that the baby would be a boy and that I could see his little heart beating strongly. Then, three days later, I would go to the labour ward - the ward I had been expecting to visit in two and a half months. Eventually she got the measurements she wanted. We were bound to each other because of the blood that was on both our hands. So I sort of went home quite, fairly kind of happy and I, at, at this point I hadn't any idea things could go wrong anyway. Sometimes a post mortem was needed to confirm the 20-week diagnosis to see if the baby had inherited a genetic problem (such as Fowler syndrome - see 'Resources'). I remained positive, we researched lots of cases of mistaken dates, inconclusive scans, and compared them to our situation; scrutinising everything to try and believe it was all one big misunderstanding. Specialist scans had a powerful effect on some parents because they could see the baby more clearly and in some cases people recognised which parts of the baby's body were not working properly. If necessary, you will be referred to a specialist, possibly in another hospital. The doctor told me he was 98% sure this was a failing twin pregnancy. There was cause for concern. The screen may be directly facing them or at an angle. Although the anomaly scan is often called a 20-week scan, you may have it any time between 18 and 22 weeks, although it's usually done between 18 and 20 weeks. Fine, go on my own. There, I would give birth. I thought I was going to burst into tears. I used to think the feeling of your baby kicking inside you and the sight of a foot poking against your skin were the most fantastic things in the world. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. Maybe our son would have overcome his problems, survived his illnesses, led a happy life. If you choose not to have the scan you can still have all other parts of your routine antenatal care. I was then told yet again bad news. I was wondering if anyone has been is this situation and can give me a glimmer of hope. Some hospitals do offer earlier anomaly scans of the baby, but they will not show as much detail as scans performed between 18 and 20weeks. I couldn't bear to see the baby and asked the midwife to take him away immediately. He sounded like a wild animal in pain, deep pain. The doctor wanted to do another blood test to confirm a significant drop in my hormone levels. With my oldest it turns out she has a minor thing that affects 1 in 1000 of the population and wont harm her at all it's just "there" and with my second the issue turned out to be nothing. We'll make an appointment with the senior sonographer, the consultant at the local hospital, and she'll do your scan and she'll be able to tell you more things'. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. I had a horrible feeling of relief. He wanted to talk about it, but I didn't. My partner was away working and was waiting to hear whether he was having a son or daughter. So had to come back in a week's time for a scan, which again is quite a common thing I found out. She describes having to make a . I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. The consultant explained that this was just very bad luck and not, as far as they knew, genetic. I had never imagined having an amniocentesis. No, you couldn't see there was anything wrong. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, 'it didn't look good' and that 'my womb looked raggedy'. ABDOMINAL CIRCUMFERENCE MEASUREMENT AT 20 WEEK SCAN. There was an extra digit on one of the hands. I've realised that being a nice person is a luxury some can't afford. It felt like a lifetime to reach our 12-week-scan. You may like someone to come with you to the scan appointment. And again, you know, you read all the books and it tells you 'this is the diagnostics', but after a while you don't hear that inside your head any more No, no, no, I'm fine - because everything's perfect. I felt empty, scared, guilty and incredibly heartbroken. By the time I left the hospital, I was in shock. Surely he couldn't have missed anything else that is so serious x. I just feel very unlucky. Good luck has not come easily over the past few years. Some say this estimate is really below the reality, and the out-of-pocket average costs are higher. I've still had no cramps or bleeding so fingers crossed everything is ok I just couldn't believe I fell down the stairs, I can't remember the last time I ever did that! Has anyone been told the wrong sex at 20 week scan? My son's congenital heart defect was detected at the 20 week scan and he had 2 other markers, no . It is a noise that will stay with me for ever. Having the scan does not hurt but the sonographer may need to apply slight pressure to get the best views of your baby. There was a very marked lack of amniotic fluid which made it difficult, not even for the scanners to see, that made the picture of the scan look very, very different. Thick milky discharge at 14 weeks.tmi pic attached. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. So we gave up and said we'd arrange the funeral ourselves. However, a few hours later there was another shift change. We saw the consultant, who was reassuring, saying that he would rescan me and was sure everything would be fine. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . The doctor or midwife looking after you will let you know before you come. So he went out for a walk. The consultant had said it wouldn't be like a normal delivery. So I no longer trusted my instincts.